Comforting Things, Vol. 3 – Sam Cohen

“Comforting Things” is a series we started when we all reached out to each other, too angry and sad to do much of anything, and thought about what we could do to make each other feel better. We’ve kept on with variations of the series – “Comforting Films” being a fave – and we’ve decided to bring it back now, as we’re all confined to our homes and facing times that are not only destructive to physical health but to mental health, as well. Twice a week for the next few weeks, Attic writers and editors will take turns sharing what it is that they’re finding comforting in the time of COVID, hoping to create a better sense of community but also, in hope that you may find something that is comforting to you as well. In this latest piece, writer Sam Cohen shares what she’s been watching, reading, and listening to through this difficult period.

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For me, comfort is synonymous with laughter. Whenever I’m struggling with anxiety, I often turn toward things that make me laugh. If I’m focused on something funny and joyful, the stressors are temporarily forgotten and replaced with an influx of endorphins. This is my primary source of comfort, especially during difficult times like the one we’re currently living through. When I’m able to laugh, truly and earnestly, everything becomes more manageable. With the addition of other comforting factors, like nostalgia and connection, I can create pockets of time that are focused on happiness above all else.

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Watching

While I always prefer to read when I have downtime, during periods of extreme stress and anxiety I typically like to switch gears and watch movies that make me happy. One of my go-to comfort movies is Almost Famous starring Kate Hudson, Patrick Fugit, France McDormand, Billy Crudup, Philip Seymour Hoffman, and Jason Lee, along with many, many others. I watched this movie for the first time when I was a teenager (it was released in 2000, but I didn’t see it until quite a few years later) and it instantly became my favorite movie. 

I have seen countless movies between then and now, and I don’t know that I’ll ever love any of them the way I love Almost Famous. It’s charming, thoughtful, and humorous. The characters are messy and insecure, and their relationships with one another are the foundation for the story. Between the amazing 70s outfits and the unforgettable soundtrack, Almost Famous is the type of movie you can lose yourself in entirely for the two-and-a-half-hour runtime. 

Focusing specifically on comfort, Stuck in Love is a movie I find myself revisiting multiple times a year. I found this movie accidentally one Valentine’s Day, many moons ago, when I was still single and wanted something kind and romantic to watch. The cast is phenomenal with Lily Collins, Logan Lerman, Greg Kinnear, Nat Wolff, Liana Liberato, and Jennifer Connelly getting the top billing. Kristen Bell makes an amusing appearance, though her character is very, very minor. 

This movie is comforting to me because it is such an honest reflection of love. Every character is trying to figure out what love means, and what it’s worth, in their own unique way. The three central characters are writers and I always become envious and full of longing when I watch this movie and see them writing in their beautiful beachfront home. Stuck in Love is, to me, the epitome of a feel-good movie because the ending is satisfying and hopeful and steeped in love.

And finally, perhaps my most nostalgic pick: You’ve Got Mail. This movie is my mother’s favorite and I spent countless hours watching and re-watching it with her throughout my entire childhood and well into my adult years. I watch You’ve Got Mail at least twice a year still, and I’ll settle onto the couch and tune into it whenever it’s on T.V. This movie is peak Nora Ephron, at turns sweet and comical, with the most stunning visuals of New York City. If you love autumn, and plaid skirts, and gorgeous bookstores, you’ll love You’ve Got Mail. It’s perfect in every possible way, and one of the best movies to watch if you’re feeling overwhelmed by the world around you. You’ll laugh, you’ll probably cry, and you’ll be left with a feeling of completeness that’s hard to find in other movies. Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks are lovely and engaging, and I am so invested in their journey no matter how many times I see this film. 

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Listening

I find it hard to focus on audiobooks when I’m looking for something comforting, as I often want to listen to content that takes me away from my thoughts instead of bringing me further into them. Lately, the main thing I’ve been listening to is the Thirst Aid Kit podcast hosted by Bim Adewunmi and Nichole Perkins. Each episode features a different celebrity, like Tom Hiddleston and Chris Evans, who Bim and Nichole discuss in terms of their attraction, talent, and body of work. 

Bim and Nichole have several rotating segments and focus on creating content that empowers women to own who they are and who they are attracted to. I love this podcast because it is so, so joyous. The two hosts are hilarious, and I love the rapport they have with each other. Several episodes have made me laugh so hard that I’ve teared up, and I deeply enjoy the segment they have dedicated to fan fiction. Bim and Nichole have created a small corner of the world where you don’t have to be ashamed of your preferences and are instead given the confidence and reassurance to be true to yourself. 

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Reading

I’ve been on a California kick over the last few weeks which has aligned perfectly with my need to read books that take me out of my head. I recently finished Slouching Towards Los Angeles: Living and Writing by Joan Didion’s Light which is a collection of essays edited by Steffie Nelson. The book bills itself as both a love letter and a thank you note to Joan Didion, and this description is incredibly accurate. Each writer has crafted their own personal essay about Didion’s work and how her work has influenced or inspired them in their own careers and lives. I enjoyed being able to read essays by writers who feel as passionately about Joan Didion as I do, but what I loved even more was the exposure to new writers who I had not previously encountered. The collection is strong from start to finish, and I’ve already re-read several of the essays because I was so enamored with them.

I have also been reading essay collections by Eve Babitz, a Los Angeles writer who focuses on being as honest as possible with her words. Eve’s writing is vibrant and assured, and I love being able to escape for a few quiet hours to explore the world of Hollywood through her eyes and experiences. Babitz is so unlike myself that I find it immensely comforting to spend time walking around in her shoes. I’ve gained a new perspective on life through her essays, and I’m glad that I’ve been able to discover different ideas and mindsets during this period of social distancing.

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Learning, Listening, and Distancing

In general, I am someone who enjoys being alone. With everything going on this has had to shift slightly, as my roommate was furloughed and now spends her days at home with me. My partner is considered an essential employee, so his schedule hasn’t changed, but I’ve found that the times where the three of us are home together have been even more meaningful lately. We have family nights where one of us cooks dinner for everyone and we jointly pick a movie and put our phones away, and I love being able to spend time with them without distraction. I’ve also chosen to deepen my Italian studies so that I can learn more than the handful of phrases I’ve taught myself thus far, and I’ve recently enrolled in a free screenwriting class as well.

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By choosing to spend my time watching, listening, and engaging with things that feel meaningful and important, I’m able to provide myself with extended moments of comfort. I’ve also taken a few social media breaks because I find that distancing myself from these platforms reduces my anxiety significantly. Now, as always, everything is a balance and it is one that I am constantly trying to find and maintain to build the best system for myself and my happiness.

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Sam Cohen is a writer and editor based in New England. She lives with her wonderful partner Caleb, and enjoys learning new languages, drinking lattes, and spending time with her loved ones. Sam is an avid reader who practices yoga and tries to laugh as often as possible.